Prudence Magnolia Love - born December 30th, 2010
Adam and I with our water baby. My favorite picture of our journey.
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So for the longest time, I've been putting off our daughter Prudence's birth story. I wasn't exactly sure why because it was such a great story to tell. I guess the only thing I can say is, when it's the right time, it's the right time. So here we go!
With Prudence I labored off and on for about 4 days before she was born. It is also known as "prodromal labor". I remember distinctly the night after Christmas, while in the kitchen making tea, I rubbed my belly and said okay Prudence whenever you are ready. Sure enough at around 2am on the 26th of December the surges began. I woke Adam (hubby) just to give him a heads up that that they had started. They weren't super heavy but I could tell they were doing something. They continued the same pattern for the next 4 days. They would start up at night and taper off by noon the next day. It was a bit discouraging at first, but only because I was excited for this brand new journey I was beginning. When it started I had this expectation that it meant I'd have a babe withing the next day or so at least. What I didn't know what that my body had a different agenda. After a couple of days of laboring off and on my wonderful midwife Jill and her assistant Sarah (who happened to be my local ICAN chapter leader) came over one morning to check on me and give me a little spiritual boost. It didn't take much from them because their presence alone was enough to remind me that everything was going just fine and I soon realized that this was just the way I was meant to labor. This was what my body needed to do. I know now that this very thing was most likely the reason the first two of my pregnancies didn't have the outcome that I had wanted. We worked on some visuals and birth art and it everything just came together for me and made perfect sense. After that, when the night hit, I welcomed the surges even more, and relaxed during the day, when I had some off time.
The night of the 29th I had gone to my parents house to celebrate the holidays with my brother and his family, who are from out of town. I remember being pretty cranky and feeling sick. I thought I might be coming down with something. I ended up going home and just wanted to lay around. At about 11:30pm I decided to finally take a nap on the couch, while hubby relaxed and watched some television. Well no sooner then 5 minutes after laying down I felt a pop. I knew instantly what it was and told hubby what had just happened. I stand up and he asks me if I was sure. I said I was positive because I felt the trickle of fluid as soon as I was in the upright position. I then made my way to the bathroom to clean myself up and give Jill a ring. She reminded me that sometimes even after your water breaks it could be hours or even longer before anything starts happening. I know she was just making sure I prepared myself in case I had a good amount of time before the babe made her appearance. She said she would get herself ready and to call if anything changes. No sooner that I hang up the phone BAM! (Haha, there's honestly no better way to explain it.) The surges start coming one after another and they. are. strong! I call Sarah and let her know. She asks if I would like her to come over. I immediately say yes because I knew I would need the support. After that my memory gets a little fuzzy for a bit. What I do remember for sure is at one point telling hubby that he had to start blowing up the pool and getting the water in, so that I could use it to labor. If you know me, then you aren't surprised that I waited to the very last minute to have that done. I also have to add that Adam had been sick for a few days beforehand. So the poor guy, who was super congested already, had to sit there and hurry to blow up the pool by mouth (cause we're awesome and never even considered getting an air pump, haha). He told me awhile later that there were several times where he felt like he was going to pass out. Yikes! (Love you babe!)
While Adam takes care of that I start pacing from the living room to the kitchen. For quite awhile it seemed that the only way to ease the pain was to do that, and to continuously hum "dear prudence" to my baby girl. Sarah had arrived pretty quickly, and right away started to tell me how wonderful I was doing, which was great to hear because to me this was uncharted territory. [I'm pretty sure at some point she called Jill to let her know it was time.] I continue to pace and hum until it doesn't seem to be helping anymore. I then decide to move to the bathroom again. Once I'm back in there is when Jill arrives. I remember standing in the bathroom in the dark and wanting no one around me. I just needed to let my body take over. The feeling of what I was going through was incredibly intense. I felt my babes body moving down further and further. I began to make these sounds that were so different. I believe it was then that I started to transition so Jill asks if I wanted to try out the pool. When getting in I take a glance at the clock and notice it was around 3:30am. As soon as I'm all the way in I took my hubby's hand layed back and continued to let me body take me where it needed to go.
It wasn't very long before things started to change significantly. I thought before that my body was awesome, well now it just started pushing all on it's own! I wasn't intentionally pushing her out. There was no "okay, push, 1, 2, 3 Lamaze kind of stuff going on. I was merely a passenger. My body new EXACTLY what to do and was doing it. I am in such complete awe of what our bodies are capable of!
I'll tell you now why this was all new to me. It was because my first two babes were brought into this world so completely different. The first two "attempts" I had made at a natural birth both ended in cesarean. The doctors of course told me that my best bet would be to stick with cesareans if I planned on having anymore children. They told me numerous times that my pelvis was too small for a baby to pass through. I knew better though. I didn't feel like what they were telling me was right. It felt like a cop-out. I did my research which led me to where I was now, in a pool, my body birthing my daughter the way it was meant to. After Jill and Sarah caught Prudence, the only thing that repeatedly ran through my head was I'm not broken, I'm not broke, I'm not broken! And you know honestly from the beginning I had no doubt in myself. I knew that I could birth her the way I wanted, no they way I needed to, but still the second she was born, it was proof.
Prudence Magnolia Love swam earthside at 4:00am, and the moment that consumes my every thought when I think of her birth is what happened right after. As they helped me bring her up to my chest there was this peacefulness. The birthing process for her was so calm, almost uneventful if that makes any sense. It's as if she didn't even realize that her surroundings had changed. She hadn't taken her first breath yet, was still receiving the remainder of oxygen and blood that she needed from the placenta, and lay there completely still. It's a picture that I can't do justice to with words. There was no worry or rush for her to be taken away from me. She didn't need patted on the back, or suctioned or anything else for that matter. There was no need for anything else to be happening. She was welcome to do everything at her own pace. When she was ready she let out a little gasp, gave her first breathe, and then out came the tiniest cry. I kissed her and said "why hello there.". Even with this being our 3rd babe, I couldn't believe that my husband and I made this perfect little being. The whole experience was just surreal and I glance over at my husband and with just one look I could tell how proud he was of me.
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